You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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