covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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