Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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