FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
