thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize