Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
