You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
