he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
