Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize
