I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
