i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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