we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
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He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
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possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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