Ambien. No doubt about it.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize