What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize