Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
