but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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