You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize