I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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