also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So many bounce houses so little time
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
