were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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