I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize