I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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