THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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