I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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