dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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