Do you still have your period?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
