She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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