Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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