You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
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I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
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Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize