Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Randomize
