we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
