Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
