too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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