Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
