Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
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It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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