yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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