What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You were trust falling into bushes
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
