I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
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I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
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My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
she's always on high-alert for lesbians