I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
handjob tips. give me some.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
