bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
