Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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