ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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