Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
