At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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