Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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