Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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