Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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