One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
