they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize