If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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